Today we were married. To the outsider, it may have appeared to be a fairy tale. But I can tell you it was not. You're not a prince. And I'm certainly no princess. There were no choruses of woodland creatures. No trolls standing guard at the door. No dragons had to be slain. And I didn't lose my shoe once (though I did snag it on the lace of my dress and almost trip down the aisle). 

You see, fairy tales, though magnificent in nature, are just that--tales. Today was real. More real than I could have ever dreamed. I felt the music in my soul. I felt the love and excitement of our guests rush through me and overwhelm me to tears. I felt the sturdy support of my father's arm, as I clung to it one last time as his daughter who belonged to no one but him. I felt the peaceful acceptance of the mountains for what was taking place on the other side of the glass. I felt so many things. But my thoughts were on you, and only you. I've never been so in love. The way you looked at me as you recited your vows meant more than any words you could have said. 

Today you gave yourself to me, and I to you. You became my husband and my companion of which any princess would be jealous. 

I'm sure you've heard it before...and sung it too (though if you're like me, you left out the last line in the presence of your parents). I have such fond memories of Halloween as a kid. I was quite the scaredy cat, and never liked anything genuinely spooky, but I loooooved dressing up and even more I looooooved CANDY!!!! 

I remember one time sneaking to the local Dari Mart with my friend when I was about 4 years old. We were playing in the back yard (most likely wall-ball against the house) while my mom was inside caring for my other 10 siblings. Don't get me wrong, she was a GREAT mother, but sometimes I was left virtually unsupervised. And, being very independent in nature, I didn't mind a bit.

So, Danielle and I decided (remember we were 4) to scrounge up all of our pennies and go get some candy from the store....aaaand not tell my mother. We walked the 3 blocks to the Dari Mart with what was probably 20 cents. We gathered up as many candy bars as our little arms could carry and went to the check-out to pay for our goods. The cashier (who thankfully recognized me as one of the doctors daughters), quickly realized we were unattended by a parent and had largely overestimated our ability to pay for the 15 candy bars with 20 cents. She graciously walked us both home to a surprised, and very embarrassed mother, who had pity on her sweet-toothed little four year old, and ended up buying her a pack of jumbo gumballs...after reminding her not to "run away" ever again. 

So, Halloween, as you can guess, was one of my very favorite days of the year. I got to dress up like a princess (which I did for almost 12 years), and eat lots and lots of caaaaandy. It's been 21 years since I ran away from home to the candy store, and many things have changed since then, but my affinity for Halloween (and candy) remains the same. And this year I had a little more time to plan...

My sister-in-law, Leigh, and I decided to have a little Halloween get-together....and then we went to Utah and didn't come back until right before the party....

Ah well, it all worked out in the end and we had some yummy food, spooky (and not-so-spooky) costumes, and lots of laughs along the way. I felt so lucky to be able to spend a whole week celebrating one of my favorite holidays with so many of my favorite people...and, of course eating a lot of candy. 

I like to think of Canada and America as sisters. Canada is the super chill, laid back, but intensely lovely sister, and America the high-strung, rebellious one, with an edge that you can't resist and a beauty you can't deny. So similar, but each possessing their own fundamentally unique personalities. 

Because I can't seem to decide to which I associate with more, I have chosen both. After all, you can't have too many sisters, right? This year, I was able to celebrate the birthdays of both my favorite girls. 

It was my first time being in Canada for her special day, and boy did she know how to throw a party. It wasn't quite as extravagant as the parties her sister likes to throw, down south, but perfect just the same. We spent the day in the park, soaking up the intensely hot sunshine and parading through town with other red and white clad party-goes...and a couple wieners. 

America's party wasn't quite as well attended seeing as there weren't as many "natives" around. But I couldn't let the day pass without reminding her that although I frequently abandon her, my heart will always be red, white, and blue. 

And to prove it to her, we rushed the border just before it closed and caught the most beautiful fireworks over the river in a sleepy town in northern Montana. Boy am I lucky to have such beautiful sisters. Happy Birthday!


Recipe Time
(courtesy of "She Knows" blog)

Firecracker cakelettes

Yields 10-14 cakes

Ingredients:

• 1 box white cake mix
• 4 egg whites
• 1/2 cup oil
• 1/2 cup water
• 1 cup sour cream

• Red and blue food coloring
• 3 packages Pop Rocks candy
• Black licorice ropes
• White frosting (less than 1/4 cup)

Directions:
Step one
Mix white cake mix, egg whites, oil, water and sour cream for three to four minutes on medium speed. Split cake batter into three equal amounts, adding red and blue food coloring to two of the portions. Coat three, 4 x 9-inch bread pans with cooking spray and lightly flour the bottoms. Add the three batters to the pans and bake at 350 degrees F for 18-23 minutes. Allow them to cool and remove from pans.

Using a 1-1/2-inch round cookie cutter, cut circles from each of the baked cakes. (I got 10 out of each cake, but you might be able to get more if you try.)

Using a serrated knife, carefully trim off the browned, baked bottoms of each cake circle.

Using a jumbo straw or plastic tube (one-half or three-quarters-inch in diameter), remove the centers of the cake circles. Be sure to save the red and blue centers to use as plugs for later.

Put a portion of the red cake plugs back into the bottoms of the red cake circles. Pipe a line of frosting around the centers of the red and white cake circles. Stack the white cakes on top of the red cakes and the blue cakes on top of the white cakes.

Add Pop Rocks down the hollow centers of the stacked cakes. Put a portion of the blue cake plugs back into the tops, covering the center filled with Pop Rocks.

Cut licorice rope pieces approximately 1-1/2 inches long and insert them into the centers of the blue cakes.

I've always had an affinity for camping. Nothing crazy (yet), but a couple nights here and there "roughing it" is just what I need to clear my mind. It was the perfect thing to do while Hannah was here and I knew just the place. I call it "SecretEST Beach", as "Secret Beach" was already taken, and this place is even more secluded. I've never seen more than one or two other people on the beach at the same time and often I am the only one. It's a dream beach; clear, still water, soft sand, and big trees for shade when you need a break from the sun. It's a bit of a challenge to hike down to, but it's another world when you get there. 

Now, Hannah and I both worked at Boy Scout camps during the summers for a couple years, and have been camping several times with family, but never had we been on a "girls only" camping trip. So, it's the perfect opportunity to share some tips for other outdoorsy females who are interested in such a venture...

Supplies:

Aside from the obvious, here are a few "girl specific" things we find handy when camping:

The first things you do when you get to a campsite (after exploring and playing a bit) is to take advantage of the daylight and gather firewood and set up the tent. Both are almost impossible to do in the dark, and can still be tricky even with headlamps. We scouted out the place and determined this to be the best spot:

Next up: the FIRE. 

Somebody's got to do it. And it's actually quite fun once you get the hang of it (as long as it's not super windy or rainy--then it's pretty miserable).

The teepee method is always the best (in my opinion). This is what I did...

I used the leftover dried coconut husks, conveniently left by the last campers, as the base. Then I stuck a bunch of crumpled up newspapers on top of that along with some kindling (small pieces of easily flammable materials such as branches, dried moss, etc.). Then you make a teepee with small-ish branches/logs. A trick Max taught me was that you always go for the dead branches that have fallen off, or are lightly attached to trees. Never use driftwood, as it has been soaking in the ocean for quite some time, and although it may look dry, it may be virtually impossible to light it on fire. After lighting the newspaper with your handy dandy lighter (we're not that primitive), you let it catch the logs on fire before you start adding larger logs to keep the fire going. It's that simple! Okay, not usually, but this time it was!

Now you get to relax and enjoy the good stuff; eating charred wieners and toasted marshmallows, watching the sun light up the ocean one last time as it dips below the horizon. It doesn't get much better than that. 

I was listening to a podcast today while I cleaned my apartment after a FULL 10 days of playing in Hawaii with my sister (let's just say I had a lot of sand to clean up). Anyway, I ran out of Radiolab podcasts and had to venture out to satisfy my hunger for knowledge--and I found some new loves. One of them being "Stuff You Should Know". Now, normally I'll listen to a podcast while I'm on my run, or in the car, and although I find them fascinating at the time, I quickly forget most of the details unless I have someone to share them with. So, since my fiance is busy running a business up in Canada and I'm "stuck" in Hawaii for a couple more weeks, I get to post my feelings here :) 

When it comes to podcasts, I'm not picky. As long as it's nerdy, I'm in. I am fascinated by just about anything when someone else takes the time to do the research for me. It's perfect; an hour-long recap of what these people have been studying (sometimes) for years. Experts in their fields. And although I wouldn't want to spend a lifetime learning about the basal ganglia, 60 minutes listening to someone who has, is quite engaging. And they touch on almost every subject imaginable. 

Today's subject: Curiosity. It started from a podcast entitled, "How Marriage Works", where it mentioned that a curious mind (or the lack thereof) can make or break a marriage.  Basically, that you need to match your partner's level of curiosity or there will undoubtedly be "issues". Now, I know for a fact that Max is a curious person, maybe too curious sometimes :) But it got me thinking, "Am I curious?" So, I searched for other podcasts on the subject and found, "How Curiosity Works". Perfect. Apparently curiosity directly opposes fear. So, if you're fearful, you won't be curious; or at least you won't act on your curiosity. And subsequently, the reverse is also true; if you're curious, you don't fear. 

So am I curious?? Well, after listening to the second podcast, I googled it. I found a quiz to determine my level of curiosity. I took the whole test, but before I could see the results, I had to sign up to be a member of a site called, "OKcupid". That's where my curiosity ended and fear kicked in. Guess I'm only curious to the amount of a little less than signing up for an online dating site with a cartoon girl in hooker boots on the homepage. Or maybe that's just common sense. 

http://www.stuffyoushouldknow.com/podcasts/how-curiosity-works/

Check it out. And then listen to 4 or 5 more...

I call it the "Disneyland Illusion". But before I describe it to you, I must warn that some may find it offensive. After all, we all know those people who treat Disney like a religion and DisneyLAND as if it were Mecca. If you're one of those (or under the age of 12 and haven't been yet), you probably shouldn't read on.

I cannot even recall how old I was at the time...8, 9 maybe. It was the first family vacation that didn't involve a van stuffed with 10 (give or take) other siblings bound for grandma's house in Utah. This time, we were headed for none other than Disneyland! I couldn't have been happier about it. Just like every other kid, I had waited for this moment my whole life. I had a vision of what it would be like and it was a mixture of all the magical commercials I'd seen on TV: Princesses everywhere you looked, just waiting to greet you and give you a big hug, a huge castle with fireworks constantly going off behind it, a place where anything could happen....

Without going into too much detail, I was a tad...dare I say it...disappointed. Don't get me wrong, I had a great time and I felt so lucky that my parents brought my family and I on a vacation other than to grandma's house, but something was missing. Where was the magic? 

I've asked myself the same question a few times since, when I have been super excited about something and then it turns out it's altogether pretty ordinary. Which is why, sadly enough, I try not to get my hopes up too much. I still get excited about things, but in a different way. Some may call me a realist, others practical, and some may think it's just a downright sad way to live. I would have to argue otherwise though. I don't think there's anything wrong with seeing things as they are. And in fact, some things, in reality, are so much better than I ever could have dreamed anyway. And that brings me to...Paradise.

At the risk of getting someone else's hopes up unrealistically, or making my paradise a universal paradise (which is, as you know, impossible), I'm going to share with you the place I can honestly say is the most beautiful place I have ever been...up to this point in my life, of course.

Ever since Max and his boys hiked the Kalalau Trail last year, I have been itching to do it. And since I moved to Kauai, it has been on the top of my to-do list. But--I didn't want to do it with just anybody. I wanted to hike it with the man I love (who also happens to be a great backpacking buddy). I had 10 days off of work while Max was here and it was the perfect time to go...except that it wouldn't stop raining. Now, a little rain doesn't scare me, but anyone who lives in Kauai (and especially those who work in the ER and hear the dispatch calls for rescues of people out on the trails during the flash floods), know better than to attempt the 11 mile trek to the Kalalau Valley in the rain. But time was running out. And I couldn't stand spending one more day inside while Max fixed my volvo (story to follow at a later time). 

So, we had a few more days left and although the forecast was "questionable", we decided to take the risk. We got all packed up and headed out, way too late in the afternoon and it had started to rain. By the time we hit the trailhead though, the rain stopped, not to be seen again for the remainder of our trip. 

We hiked, and sweated, and hiked some more (and sweated some more), and the views just kept getting better and better. 

We arrived at our destination well after dark (as was expected), with aching legs and tired shoulders. And it was already my favorite place in the world. The moon was full and shone just bright enough so we didn't need flashlights to set up camp. But first we took off our packs and sat on the warm sand, looking out at the moonlit ocean. The night was so still, not a breath of wind. I had no idea what this place would look like in the morning, but I was already smitten. After our legs had a minute to rejuvenate, we rinsed off in a trickling waterfall, made some dinner (always gourmet when camping with Max), and went to sleep, so exhausted, but so excited for the next couple of days. 

I woke up earlier than Max, partly because the sand was starting to feel like cement underneath me, but mostly because I wanted to explore our new home! And this is what I saw...

And this...

And this...

I could not have imagined more breathtaking views. This was certainly no Disneyland Illusion. It was another world out there. Cellphones were redundant, money was useless, and the only concern I had was whether or not I put on enough sunscreen. I spent the day relaxing, playing in the kiddie pool (a pool of ocean water that came up over the sand bar and got stuck, making a perfect bath), eating delicious meals, and soaking in as much sun as my freckly skin could handle, while Max played and boogie-boarded in the huger-than-life waves. I never wanted to leave. 

Time seemed to stand still out at Kalalau and we were tempted to do as our nudist hippie neighbors and stay there for months (minus the whole nude part). Unfortunately, I had to get back to work, and Max had a flight to catch. So, the next day, reluctantly, we trekked the 11 miles back to civilization. It was so hard to turn our backs to this wonderland and the only thing that kept me going was the thought that we would do this again in the future.

Is it the future yet?

Every girl (and the occasional boy with “girl-ish” locks) knows the feeling; a tickling sensation, usually on the arm, that drives you nuts. You swat at it and swat at it, sure that it’s a bug or other type of creepy, crawly until finally, minutes (and sometimes hours) later, you find it; that sneaky piece of hair that has dislodged itself from your scalp and attached at just the right spot on your sleeve to hang over and give your arm the most annoying tickle every few seconds. We call it the “phantom hair”. And there are few things less grievous in this world. Or so I thought...

A few days ago I was in the shower, just minding my own business when I felt it; the tickle. It started on my head and I gave it a couple swats. A few seconds later it moved down to my shoulder. I swatted again. All in all it was about a 30 second battle. I didn’t think much of it seeing as this feeling rarely amounts to a discovery other than one of these phantom hairs, but I gave it one more swat and this time I got it. But unfortunately it wasn’t a harmless little hair. It was a SPIDER! And not just any spider, the HUGEST spider I had ever seen with thick, hairy legs, and a GIANT body and I had just swatted it off my NECK! The thing was literally the size of my palm and it was now squirming around in my bathtub fighting for its life...and I was doing the same. But I was a lot louder about it. Max heard my screams and came running in to what he probably thought was a murder scene. It might as well have been. 

I was still screaming and almost in frantic tears as he did what any good man would do when a spider attacks their woman in the shower....give it a hot bath. He turned on the hottest hot water and watched it slowly stop moving until it went limp. He swore he was baked, but I knew better. After all, a creature that size does not give up the ghost after a two minute swim in a jacuzzi. He wasn’t dead, he was just relaxed. Max plucked him out of the water and placed him gently on a paper towel on the bathroom counter. I made him promise to kill him for good before I hopped back in the shower to finish what I had started and try to calm down a bit. 15 minutes later I got out and to my alarm I saw an empty paper towel and no spider carcass in sight. My heart started racing once again as I went to confront Max in the kitchen. 

“Tell me you flushed him,” was all I said. 

At that, his face dropped and he ran into the bathroom. He started frantically looking around the counter and picking up the clothes from the floor and shaking them out. I was seriously freaking out at this point and my blood was all but boiled.

“You didn’t kill him?!”

“I told you he was still alive!!”

“He could be anywhere!”

“Tell me you’re Joking. Just tell me you’re joking.”

But there was no admittance. He kept looking, but I knew it was hopeless. The spider had come back to life and was now in hiding, waiting for the moment when I was just vulnerable enough for him to get his revenge...like being naked--in the shower. 

I proceeded to "question" Max for 15 minutes or so while he tried to calm me down, but it didn’t help. That monster was roaming around my house because the one man I am supposed to trust with my life let him live. 

I locked myself in my room and fumed, unable to speak to him for the next hour. All the while I thought up ways my attacker could reemerge and started to get more and more antsy being inside the house. I had to get out. I stormed into the kitchen where my failed assassin sat, working on his computer as if there wasn’t a gigantic, blood thirsty beast roaming around that could pounce at any moment. He tried to lighten the mood once again but I was having none of it. 

And then he showed me something that made me more upset than the empty paper towel ever could...a tupperware with a salted spider inside. Yes, he had it the whooooole time and thought it would be a funny joke to let me believe it had come back to life. 

All I can say is he’s lucky I love him because I sure didn’t like him too much that day. 

Disclaimer: Despite the obvious trauma, Max and I are still engaged :) And he was just teasing (as he keeps reminding me), which is what big brothers are trained to do. And although I feel totally justified in my reaction, a tiny bit of it may have been due to the fact that I was PMSing. So, babe, next time check the calendar before you pull something like this...and, if at all possible, please don't ever let it involve a man-eating attack spider again.

To call my Max an adventurer would be largely understated. He thrives on discovering new treasures and going where few (or none) have gone before. You can see it in his face when he's getting ready for such an outing. He can barely contain his boyish excitement, and you can see his mind teeming with possibilities. It's quite contagious actually.

Yesterday we explored a place he's been wanting to explore for over a year. They call it the "Shangri La" of Kauai. Now, anywhere in Kauai could be considered Shangri La, if you ask me, but this place was different. I think part of the excitement of it (or anything, for that matter) was the journey to get there. And, as with most things, the harder the journey, the sweeter the reward.

It was one of those things where I had no idea what I was getting myself into, and it was probably better that way. I'm happy I did it, but I'm even happier to be done with it :) 

I should have been alerted at the fact that you have to drive 4 miles on insane terrain to even get to the trailhead, but I wasn't. I thought it would be like any other hike in Kauai: hot, possibly a little muddy, and a strenuous workout. If only it were just those things. Firstly, I was not dressed for the occasion.

Here I am, totally clueless, thinking I was smart to wear swimsuit-ish hiking clothes as I was warned we would be getting a little wet. What I should have been wearing was a full-on waterproof, mud-proof, scratch-proof (and possibly glow in the dark) body suit. Gotta get me one of those...

The first part of the hike was pleasant. We crossed a couple streams, picked some guavas and raspberries, and enjoyed the lush green earth which encapsulated us. We only encountered 3 other people along the trail; a guy setting up for a search and rescue course, and another brave couple on their way down after camping overnight...but even they didn't make it to Shangri La. 

It wasn't until we started trudging uphill that I realized my fate. The trail got narrower, muddier, and much more overgrown. My legs and arms were being scratched by razor-like ferns with every step and the branches would snag my hair and backpack as I crawled, scrambled, and tore my way through the brush. Every 50 feet or so we'd walk through slippery mud up to our shins, and I almost lost a shoe on more than one occasion. It was easily the hardest hike I have ever been on. I tried my best to stay positive seeing as Max had waited so long to do it, but it was impossible not to feel a little frustrated at times.  

I didn't take photos of the hard parts, partially because I would have looked miserable, but more so because there was no way I could have even got to the camera. But. This is what I looked like after emerging from the first of several difficult sections. Max had to force the smile on my face.

There was a whole lot more of that before we finally made it to the first tunnel, but that is where my mood changed. These tunnels were built almost 100 years ago to divert water down through the center of the island for sugar cane production. They have since been abandoned but are still a remarkable sight to see. Perfectly straight, mile-long, man-made caves dug right through the mountain. It was impossible not to think of the years and years of labor those men (and possibly women) spent for something only to be forgotten before the end of the century. It was so eery being inside the tunnel with only a pin hole of light on the other end, promising and eventual exit. The water was thigh-deep and very muddy at parts and I couldn't help but think of what could be lurking inside. It also didn't help that Max kept mentioning that it would be the perfect place to film a horror movie. There's a reason I don't watch horror movies...

After trudging through the first tunnel, we stopped and ate a short, but much needed lunch, before crossing a few more streams, waterfalls, a perfect camping spot, and into the second tunnel.

Upon exiting the second tunnel we saw what we had sacrificed our bodies for. This was it, Shangri La. And oh how magnificent it was. I'll let the pictures tell the rest. 

We freshened up in the falls and wondered at the beauty and stillness of this place. We were miles and miles from any other human beings and forgot for a second the traumatic journey we had just endured. We didn't have long, as the sun was quickly descending and the rain clouds were moving in. We were just heading out when Max saw it; tunnel number 3. They failed to mention it in the guidebook and Max couldn't resist checking it out. I bent down to empty my shoe of rocks and before I looked up, he was gone--off to explore the tunnel. He emerged a few minutes later with a huge grin on his face and a vow to return to this place and give tunnel number 3 it's due credit. 

Hopefully I will have healed by then...

This is my neighbor, Julie. Not Jugee--but Julie. I broke her arm this day. Well, I suppose I didn't break it, but it got broke. And I (being the wonderful ER nurse I am, with x-ray vision) told her it was likely just a sprain and to "watch it" for the next couple days. Whoops. Everything worked out in the end (for me anyway) and she didn't end up with necrotic bones like the doctor teased me could happen. 

You see, hiking in Kauai is quite a bit different than hiking anywhere else. First of all, it rains. A lot. Like, almost every day. And when it's not raining, it has been for the past week. Which makes it gorgeous! --but muddy. And it isn't just any mud. It's this red clay-like mud that covers the bouldery trails and feels exactly like butter under your feet when the conditions are poor--which, as I mentioned, is just about every day. That doesn't stop me though. And I don't even care that I'm donating my 300 dollar hiking boots to breathtaking views and stunning vistas. I may need to rethink taking people with me though...

Jugee and I decided yesterday that it would be a good idea to do the Alaki Swamp Trail up in Kokee Park. I knew it would be muddy, but the guidebook promised a boardwalk to protect us from the slippery mud. What it didn't say is that you have to hike 2 miles in to get to the boardwalk--in the mud. It was completely overcast and though we knew there were beautiful views all around us, the fog was so thick, it made it impossible to see anything off the trail.

After slipping and sliding all the way up and down the rocky trail for quite some time, the clouds parted, just as we came upon the most amazing view. As it came visible, the man in front of us yelled, "Welcome to Jurassic Park!" to which we all had a good laugh. After quickly snapping a couple pictures, it was gone--just as quickly as it had come, and never to be seen again...not for the rest of the day anyway.

It all went downhill after that. The views were completely blanketed in that thick fog and the trail got reeeally tricky. My boots were taking it like a champ, but Jugee quickly discovered that her tennies had zero traction. That's when she got this little beauty:

Just like the views, the camera doesn't do it justice (and it's even better today). We managed to enjoy the rest of the hike, though, and Jugee even got to bust out her poncho which was probably the highlight of the trip.

After hiking all the way out on her sore leg, we surveyed the damage. 

So if you don't want to come out with broken bones or covered in mud, bruises, and scrapes, maybe you should pass the next time I ask you to climb a mountain. But it sure makes for some good stories....

I've never met someone like Max before. In large part, it's what attracted me to him in the first place. It's in the way he interacts with other people and the world around him. He's insanely optimistic about the opportunities life has and takes advantage of them in countless ways. He's able to make things work I've thought were impossible just by asking. I, on the other hand, am more reserved and don't like to ask people to do things that are against the rules, or have never been done before. But I have seen so much success come from Max doing just that. Granted, he does get told "no" every once in a while, but you'd be surprised how often the answer is "yes"! Or at least, "no, but you could do it this way". He's my role model, and I've learned a lot from trying his methods (and saved a lot of time and money too). 

One thing Max likes to do is take advantage of all the happenings in the city he lives, or is visiting. He'll go to storage wars, auctions, universities, you name it. He usually isn't looking for anything in particular--but sometimes he picks up some real treasures along the way. I love his curiosity and love that I get to tag along on some of his escapades and watch his boyish excitement as he discovers new possibilities. 

Last month, when Max was here in Kauai with me, he decided to go to an auction while I was at work. And he brought me home the sweetest treat--KITES! A bag full of them. Beautiful kites! Bright colors! And only a couple were in need of minor repair. I love them. But what I love even more, is that he sat through an entire auction to spend 5 dollars on a bag full of kites for his love.